Can you love two guys at the same time?
He’s some kind of wonderful in a rom-com kind of way. Eyes that tell more of a story than Stephanie Meyer and lips that were made to melt against yours… There’s only one problem. This dreamboat ain’t your usual sailing ship – he may be Patz-perfect, but he’s NOT your boyfriend. *Needle screeches off record*. Uh-oh!
Love is a term we toss around pretty easily these days – we love everything from our mums to neon-yellow nail polish (zing!). If your affections are truly split down the middle, it begs the question: can you really LOVE two people at once? The answer is: sure – but not for long.
It takes two to tango when it comes to love, and sooner or later your two guys are gonna force you to choose. Imagine it was YOUR boyfriend saying he was torn between two girls. You certainly wouldn’t be waiting around forever, and even if he chose you, your relationship would never be the same again. Remember these risks, and possible hurt, if you plan on acting on your unexpected new crush.
Roll Up, Roll Up, Roll Up: Which Player Will You Choose?
This one’s a toughie, so for some advice on how to choose the hottie for you we asked GF’s resident psychologist Dr Michael Carr-Gregg. “In my experience as the GF psychologist and a practicing psychologist for 20 years, there is no doubt that the quality of a relationship works best when built on a solid underlying friendship, and meets the needs of the two people involved. So choose the person with whom you have the most solid underlying friendship. Recognize that a relationship is far more enjoyable when you’re with someone who enriches your life, not simply reflects it. Appreciate your differences.” Hear that ladies? It’s Vote One Friend Guy!
Dr Mike goes on to explain that his overall feeling is that you know the relationship is over when you are constantly thinking about someone else. It’s a red flag in a major kinda way. “I encourage GF readers not to stay in one relationship for a long time. Meeting and going out with new people is healthy and allows you to make better and better choices as time goes on.”
Sticking with what you know means predictability and security, but you run the risk of never knowing what might have been. Choosing the new kid on the block means an exciting new chapter, but hurting someone you’re close too.
So who do you pick: the old friend or the new blood? Ultimately, this is one of those situations where you have to make a choice and, in a way, it’s impossible to know if it was the right one or the wrong one. It’s just part of being in life, and being in relationships. It’s not always picnics and snuggles – it’s tough and it can hurt. The best you can do is act with love and respect to both people involved, and be (respectfully) honest with everyone involved. It’s rare you can have your cake and eat it too, so order your next helping with care!
Celebs Who Dumped For Love
Ryan Phillipe and Abbie Cornish. Dumped = Reese Witherspoon. Did It Last? Yes!
Jude Law and Sienna Miller. Dumped = Sadie Frost. Did It Last? No!
J.Lo and Ben Affleck. Dumped = Cris Judd. Did It Last? No!
Brad and Angelina. Dumped = Jen Did It Last? Yes!
Copyright Georgia Clark 2010